20 Things

I wrote this a while back when this was still a fad. Did not feel like posting it on facebook. Enjoy.

20 Things about Steven

1. I am truly embarrassed I’m actually following this fad.
   
2. That being said, I do enjoy anything random. There’s always a strange beauty, I find, in chaos. So hopefully, these articles follow that format.
   
3. So far, university life feels like juggling grenades. It looks and feels spectacular, until you blow yourself up. But that’s why it’s fun. 
   
4. I have an affinity (but not a knack) for wry humour. Sadly, this humour is not in vogue. Hence, cheekiness has gotten me in quagmires quite a few times.
   
5. For the life of me, I cannot stand caramel, but I can eat chocolate with nuts all day. Suck on that, allergenic people.
   
6. I cannot figure out the taste value of raw fish. Nor cannot I figure out the premium associated in inefficiently wrapping cold rice in a cylindrical shape. In summary: sushi is overrated.
   
7. This is taking a long time to write. That probably means I’m starting to think too much.
   
8. I’m a stickler for proper punctuation. Periods ftw.
   
9. I have probably the worst sleep diligence amongst all of you.
   
10. My policy on drugs and consumerism is, if I’m going to waste my life away on useless shit, the least I require is that I waste it on classy useless shit – wine, cigar, and a Hugo Boss jacket, that’s the way to go. Thank god I’m broke as fuck right now.
    
11. That being said, music is probably my hugest addiction right now. I cannot think about anything without something blasting in my ear. As well, individuality (aka eccentricity) is pretty important to me, so if you start liking too many songs I like, I get annoyed.
    
12. If I despise you, it’s probably because I really respect you. What does that imply?
    
13. Minimalism is the spice of life. I love to savour the lack of details.
    
14. I have a lot of old clothes that are just plain ugly and too small. Sadly, I’m also Asian: hence, I don’t feel conscientious enough to give my sweatshop, 5-cent-made, swag t-shirts, to drug addict hobos freezing on the streets of Toronto. Sadly, I’m probably doing all parties a favour. Go figure.
    
15. I am a huge Bose fanboy, which probably means my brains will eventually be turned into mush through the constant barrage of sound waves.
    
16. My black belt still has not proved useful so far in my life. I guess this means I’m too much of a pussy? Should start some bar fights.
    
17. I subconsciously fear heights; I fall off airplanes all the time in my nightmares. Rollercoasters and mountain-climbing have been fine, though. Try skydiving soon?
    
18. Places to visit before rotting away in a dirt mound: Pakistan, UAE, Morocco, Italy, Venezuela, Australia, Kenya
    
19. I sometimes know exactly what type of person I am. Other times, I would have no clue. That happened somewhere between 10 and 18. Yes, I just made that shit up.
    
20. I relish in and enjoy accepting the ironies in life. This has gotten me into some awkward situations as well.
    
21. I firmly believe that the most truly happy and successful people in life are optimistic cynics.
    
22. That’s a lie: I don’t believe in the concept of believing. There's something to be said about being an anal empiricist when everyone is talking about touchy-feely things.
    
23. I love any art, in any medium, that makes no sense. 
    
24. I probably should have some thoughts on true love too, to wrap up this list. But 22) limits the amount of material I can speak on the subject.
    
25. Yes, I realize I’m only supposed to have 20. You can stop being smug now.

Reply to finance article coming up.